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About This Blog

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Welcome to my blog, Living with Benign Fasciculation Syndrome. You're here because you're madly searching the internet trying to find answers for the severe frustration, angst and fear you're experiencing. I've been there: madly searching the internet. Sometimes I still go there. Right now I'm giving you a HUGE virtual hug and telling you that you're not alone and you are ok. I mean it. You're ok. It's strange that something so alarming that happens to so many of us has no explanation. I say so many of us because, even though I don't know anyone else in my life who has it or has had it, I have found many people in and on the internet and in Facebook groups who do. We are not alone, even though it feels like it. Speaking of Facebook groups, you may find some comradery there. There's BFS Recovery  that has 4.7k members! And there's Benign Fasciculation Syndrome  that has 3k members. I've found those groups to be more anxiety producing for m...
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Benign Fasciculation Syndrome and Anxiety

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Why Me? It's a question I've asked over and over and the longer I deal with it, the more clarity I have on the answer: Anxiety. What caused the onset of my symptoms was a bad fight with my sister. One of those this-is-the-end-of-our-relationship fights. (It wasn't). But that's not what caused my BFS. It goes so much farther back than that. My relationship with anxiety started after I gave birth to my first son, in 2007. He was a really hard baby - he had cholic, couldn't be put down, and didn't sleep more than an hour at a time. I felt sick to my stomach all the time, like there had to be an answer, a fix, a solution. I always knew I wanted more children so my husband and I decided to have the second one close to the first, to, you know, not prolong the torture. At 20 weeks pregnant with my second child we found out he had a craniofacial abnormality - a cleft lip and potential cleft palate. It was like being punched in the gut. Over and over. The next several m...
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